To Mend the Broken Hearts

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I follow Thought Catalog on twitter and if you do too, you must have seen a fair amount of articles about love and relationships from them on your timeline. Since I haven’t been in a romantic relationship before, I can’t have a say in how well those pieces help me with mine. Even so, I absolutely can say that there are some of them that are truly well-written and I can concur with to a profound extent. Take this article about “Quotes That will Make You Rethink What Love Means,” for instance. 

Among those quotes is a really empowering, face-slapping one from which I can hear a scream of feminism. Hold on, though I mentioned feminism and the article addressed girls specifically itself, it is not only for women. Men can also read it, let every word of it lie deep in your heads, then apply it to your lives. Both men and women go through breakups anyways, sometimes painful, hard-to-get-over ones. I’m positive these wise words can by some means heal or help you make it through it at most. 

You think because he doesn’t love you that you are worthless. You think that because he doesn’t want you anymore that he is right—that his judgement and opinion of you are correct. If he throws you out, then you are garbage. You think he belongs to you because you want to belong to him. Don’t. It’s a bad word, ‘belong.’ Especially when you put it with somebody you love. Love shouldn’t be like that. Did you ever see the way the clouds love the mountain? They circle all around it; sometimes you can’t even see the mountain for the clouds. But you know what? You go up top and what do you see? His head. The clouds never cover the head. His head pokes through, because the clouds let him; they don’t wrap him up. They let him keep his head up high, free, with nothing to hide him or bind him. You can’t own a human being. You can’t lose what you don’t own. Suppose you did own him. Could you really love somebody who was absolutely nobody without you? You really want somebody like that? Somebody who falls apart when you walk out the door? You don’t, do you? And neither does he. You’re turning over your life to him. Your whole life, girl. And if it means so little to you that you can just give it away, hand it to him, then why should it mean any more to him? He can’t value you more than you value yourself.

— Toni Morrison

I am no love expert, but hope this little advice helps.